Difficult conversations with employees are hard in any field, but especially with an in-home care provider. Have you, as a parent or nanny, ever felt uneasy broaching a topic? Carole Kramer Arsenault, BBN&N’s founder, was recently featured in a family podcast: Ask The Doulas, discussing just that. Check out the podcast to learn more!
Communication is Key!
Join at 2 minutes and 8 seconds to hear the importance of clear expectations. Right from the start parents should be up front. They should explain what they expect from the nanny with clearly stated and written job responsibilities. This way later on there will be less confusion. Carole states that communication is important and it takes time to get to know one another at a new job. Don’t be shy and just ask questions. If things are hectic with the kids around, ask if you can go over a few things later that evening.
At 4 minutes and 58 seconds, Carole explains that during the Covid Pandemic many more parents began working from home. Nannies are getting used to a new norm, that is working with parents at home. Parents come out of their office for lunch and of course want to say hello to the kids. This new dynamic just requires a conversation between the parents and nanny about what to expect.
Miscommunication is an Easy Fix
Listen in at 5 minutes and 22 seconds to hear how nannies actually learn from the positive examples set by their employers. If a nanny is told by Mom, “I want to touch base with you before you leave work today.” Nannies see that it’s not a big deal to confront one another about concerns of any size. The mom set an example; she had a thought and discussed it with the nanny right away. There’s no need for difficult conversations with employees if you discuss issues right away before frustration builds. The longer it sits the bigger it becomes; many times it’s just miscommunication and is an easy fix. However it is important to remember to pick your battles and not be too critical; remember we’re all human.
The Importance of Mindfulness
Tune in at 7 minutes and 34 seconds to hear Carole Kramer Arsenault, a Certified Mindfulness Instructor, discuss the importance of self-awareness and mindfulness. She states that being mindful of our feelings and in touch with the present moment allows us to identify what particularly is bothering us. This then make communication easier as we’re able to pinpoint and discuss our concern.
Join in at 9 minutes and 50 seconds as Carole explains that part of being mindful is being aware of why we’re upset and how we can appropriately regulate emotions. We’re children’s role models and want to raise them to be mindful of their feelings and how to handle them. “Validating feelings is huge,” says Carole. Acknowledge and state their feeling; give them time to feel it. First, this lets a child feel heard. Then it allows us, as caregivers, to discuss and teach children how to react to different emotions.
At 12 minutes and 19 seconds
Carole says, “For a parent and nanny to be able to listen to each other, really listen, and validate is wonderful. And what happens is the respect that grows between the two people is a such a positive event that the kids benefit, everyone benefits!” The kids see and feel the support and respect between the nanny and parents. This trickles down to the respect the child shows the adults. At Boston Baby Nurse & Nanny we teach mindfulness to nannies and parents through our online class, Mindfulness: Raising Self-Aware Children.
“We truly care about the family unit.” -Carole Kramer Arsenault
Listen in at 14 minutes and 4 seconds to hear that when we integrate the mind, body, and soul to simply take time to breathe we can decrease our anxiety. We want to make parents and caregivers aware of simple techniques they can add into their family’s routine to take time to relax.
Tune in at 17 minutes and 7 seconds as Carole says, “It all comes back to mindfulness, thinking, communication, and listening.” Everyone sees situations differently. Sometimes we just need to take off our colored glasses to take time to communicate with one another. Overtime this builds a strong and positive parent & nanny relationship.
At 22 minutes and 50 seconds
we are reminded that the power of mindfulness with children is so much greater than with adults because they’re still developing. Take the opportunity to instill mindfulness early because in doing so children are, “Strengthening the neural pathways that underly focus, self-control and self-regulation.” In our online class
we have videos and tips on how to get younger children to calm down, breathe, and meditate in an appropriate, child-friendly manner.
Over time you won’t have to worry about difficult conversations with employees as you and your nanny form a strong, working relationship. When you work with our nanny agency we are always here to support you. Reach out to us if you ever need help approaching a difficult conversation.