Welcoming a new baby into your home is very exciting whether it is your first baby or your fifth. If it is not your first baby it is important to think about how to best prepare your other children for the new arrival. It is a big change for everyone especially if you have one child who has had all the attention.
Your Child’s Age
It is essential to tailor your strategy based on the age of your child and how much they will be able to understand. If you have a young toddler he will not be able to understand as much as a four or five year old. A toddler will probably have more difficulty understanding the change but you can still talk with them about it. You can have more complex discussions with an older child who can imagine having a baby brother or sister and what that may be like. Be sure to ask them questions about their feelings like what they are most excited about and ask if they have any concerns. Always emphasize that you love your child and that the new baby could never “replace” her. Taking a sibling class can be a great way for your child to better understand the concept that they will have a new sibling soon.
Tangible Examples
Even if your child is just a baby it is important to talk about the fact that you are having a baby and they will be a big sister or a big brother. A good time to bring this up could be when you start developing a noticeable bump that you can show your child. You can point out that a baby is growing inside you and will be their new sibling. It can be helpful to use tangible examples, especially for younger kids.
- Show videos and photos of them as a baby so they understand how babies look and act
- If you have family or friends with babies bring your child and spend time with these other babies
- Read books about welcoming a new baby into the home and becoming an older sibling
- Use dolls or stuffed animals to demonstrate how to change diapers and other ways to care for a new baby.
- Let your child try to do these things with his doll and stuffed animals
- Ask your child to draw or paint a picture of their new sibling and the new family
Consistency
A new sibling is a big change for a child so try to keep other routines consistent. Try to avoid other big changes at the same time such as a move or introducing a new skill such as potty training. This may be overwhelming for your child. If you want to potty train your child in the near future think about starting a few months before you deliver or wait until months after.
Stay Calm
Welcoming another baby into your home can be stressful. Try to find ways to relax and unwind before and after the baby. Your children will sense your anxiety so try to remain calm throughout the process. Some children react negatively to a new sibling but usually warm up within a few days. If this is the case try to keep your composure and process any feelings with your child individually. Remind them that you love them and the new baby will never take their place.
